Memo From Human Resources (I wish)

The following is from an email forwarded by my brother-in-law. I don't know who originally wrote it, but no copyright infringement is intended, blah blah blah. Sorry, I can't figure out how to make the lettering any smaller, and it takes up a lot of space, so I'll put it behind a cut.

Never have I wished so much that I was still at my last workplace, so that I could pass this around(quietly, that is).

( *%$$#&@#@&&%*#?!! )